My boyfriend is so amazing

I know it's been a while. So I'm sorry for that. But it's time to start posting again.

First of all my boyfriend and I just celebrated our 6 month anniversary last month. It was nice to have him there for the occasion. Secondly it's my birthday in 2 days, so he sent me a card (and a letter) in the mail because he forgot to bring it with him. Before I tell you what the card said let me also tell you that until I got home from work yesterday and had a 2 hours video chat with him I was about 80% sure that our relationship (or at least the romantic part) was over.

But the minute I read this card I started crying. I know it was just a Hallmark card, but I also know that it echoed a lot of the things that he tells me or has told me in the past. So here's what the card said.

Everyday, I write you love letters in my mind.
But for some reason, when I'm with you,
 I can't seem to find the right words to tell you what's in my heart.
I think of you every single day and discover something about you that makes me love you even more.
But when you're together, I get caught up in the moment and I forget everything I've wanted to tell you.
But on your birthday, I want you to know that even though sometimes the words fail me -
in my heart I write you love letters everyday.
Happy Birthday.

Then of course he added his own little personal note about how much he loves me and that he'll be thinking about me on my birthday.

As it stands, relationship wise, there are still some things that he and I need to work out. But we had a long talk last night and I think we're on a good path now.

Easter in AZ

That's right I'm going to visit my boyfriend in less than 2 weeks. I can not wait. Long distance relationships suck, but we try to make the best of it.

We've got most of the trip planned already just waiting for his work schedule to be finalized then we'll know for sure how much time we have together and what we can do.

Time to finish a post

I just looked at my list of posts and found 4 unfinished drafts that I've started in the last 2 weeks. I thought I was about time that I sit down and finish one. In addition to those that I've actually started writing there have been about 3 times where I have started mentally drafting a post but haven't been at or near a computer.

So what to talk about? Well first of all that lotto ticket I mentioned... not a winner. Secondly work has been nearly unbearable lately. Third, I think I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Okay let's talk about that one a bit.

My boyfriend is awesome, but lately unbeknown to him (although it will be now since I know he reads this) I haven't been exactly fair to him. I don't know if all women compare their current boyfriends to past relationships, and I don't know if that will ever stop but I hope so. Because anytime anything happens with my current bf, let's call him Micheal (pseudonyms are fun) I compare it to my last boyfriend (or kinda boyfriend or whatever the hell it was). and I don't think that's fair to Micheal.

See the thing is I'm still friends with my kinda ex. Well not even friends. It's really hard to describe our current relationship, much like it was difficult to define our previous relationship. There is still a lot of flirty comments being bandied about. And I know I really ought to put the kibosh on things in that respect but to be honest he and I started flirting about 5 minutes into our first conversation and never really stopped. Except for those brief occasions when we didn't talk at all. And honestly if it's a choice between a little harmless flirting and not talking to him at all I'll take the flirting, because he's become one of my best friends.

I know I'm not technically doing anything wrong, but it still feels wrong and maybe that should be enough for me to decide to make a change. I don't know. I am just so scared of losing either of them. Any thoughts from the readers about how I should proceed?

A Romantic Weekend

It's been quite the past couple of weeks. New furniture. Friend potentially coming to visit,  then same friend not coming to visit, then deciding to come after all.

In the end I'm quite happy that he did come. We had a wonderful weekend full of exciting adventures. Unfortunately because we weren't sure if he was coming some of our original plans didn't work out. But we had a really nice time anyway.

Thursday night was the first time I had met him in person. I was very nervous waiting for him. But it turned out alright in the end. Thursday night we just hung out. Then on Friday after he walked me to work, I had to work a half day, then he picked me up at my office and I gave him the grand tour and he got to meet my co-workers. Then we went to my place.

We spent a little bit of time setting up some of my furniture. Then went for an early dinner/late lunch at East Side Marios and toured the mall. I had to take him to Tim Horton's since he had never been. Then back to my place to finish putting together the table and chairs and watch the NHL Allstar Draft.

Saturday we went to the local university and did a quick wander through. We took a beautiful picture of us in our snow gear, but it turned out he had set the camera to video mode. Then we checked out the free food samples at the organic food conference that was going on there this weekend. Then we went to the mall so that I could buy some shoes for a romantic dinner we had planned.

Then we headed downtown where we walked around little shops and such, nothing compared to the Forks. Then off to church. We went to this really old, really beautiful Catholic church. And just barely made it to the restaurant in time for our reservation. We had a 3 course fondue dinner. It was wonderful.

And then Sunday we had a very relaxed day and just tried to enjoy our last day together.  And he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was a good day but also a sad day.