Soothing Words

Has anyone seen the movie Sidney White? No well it's a kind of modernized version of Snow White. It stars Amanda Bynes where instead of 7 Dwarfs (dwarves?) there are 7 Dorks (which I would be reminded actually means whale penis) and the mirror is a Hot or Not page. It's kind of amusing in a fluffy trying to kill time kind of way.

Why am I giving you a movie review instead of doing a blog post, you ask? Well see the Witch in the movie (Rachel Witchburn) has soothing words like Gucchi and Prada. And after today I had to come up with a few of my own soothing words.

Jay Cutler's Pouty face:

Shoe Shopping:

Starbucks Coffee... or anything really. And meeting friends for coffee or lunch. Now mind you this is not in anyway a comprehensive list. It's just a few random items to keep me going until the next time.

I guess it wasn't meant to be

I tried really hard in the middle of the night last night to order a Jay Cutler Chicago bobblehead for my desk at work. But since I'm in Canada I wasn't able to complete the purchase. So I called in today to order. Turns out shipping on the item is as much as the actual item. So I decided to skip it. My desk will just have to continue to be bobblehead-less.

You know you have a problem when...

Alright for those of you who haven't been following all the off-season Jay Cutler drama (or who don't really get sports) let me boil it down into normal work terms.

Imagine that you are doing a job and then you find out that your company went to other companies in the industry to find someone who does the same thing as you do and tried to hire them without telling you. You'd be a little pissed right? But eventually you'd get over it and all would be well. Or you'd try to find somewhere else to work. OR you'd covertly try to screw your company and undermine your boss while continuing to collect a pay cheque and explore other options.

That's pretty much what's going on here. Except instead of handling the situation like a mature adult Cutler has decided to go the whiny child route. And instead of being disgusted by his lack of maturity I find it somewhat endearing. What does that say about me?

Far, Far Away

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. I don't know if that's true in my case. When I'm in the middle of a sports season I usually pick up a "boyfriend" for that sport. College basketball, college football, actual football... well you can see where this is going. But quickly after the season I tend to forget about them and move on. I mean I rarely mention Jay Cutler anymore.

Perhaps it's a good thing then that my office crush is taking some time off soon. Perhaps not being around him all the time will help me get over it. I'd really like to move on although the way things have been going in my dreams lately maybe I'm better to just stick with what I've got.

So Christmas Wishes Do Come True

Last week I decided that it would be excellent if we had a Broncos/Chargers AFC West Championship game to end the regular season. Of course that was dependant on a couple of things. The Broncos had to lose this week to Buffalo (which the did) and the Chargers had to beat Tampa Bay (which they did).

I can't really lie I was hoping that the Broncos would clinch a playoff spot. Even if they're terrible I like to watch them play. Okay that's not really true it's all about Jay Cutler. But really this game was going to happen whether it was for a championship or not so the fact that it means something is even batter.

Oh and while I'm on the topic of football, I lost in the first round of the playoff in fantasy so I'm out of the money but I'm in a 3rd place match up this week. Not that it means anything. Much like Saints beat down of the Lions (not that it was unexpected).

I'm disappointed

One of the disadvantages of having a rather large family (there are 6 of us excluding significant others) is that you have to come up with Christmas gifts for all of them. This was fine back when you couldn't afford much and neither could they. If you bought them a DVD or a book that was awesome. Now it's much more difficult. We all have our own money and you don't think twice about dropping $50 on something you kind of sort of want. Hell I just spent $500 shopping online.

On the other hand it's also difficult trying to come up with a list of things you want from them. So I started digging around online for things I might possibly want. One of my first stops was NFL.com. Where I discovered that I really want a Jay Culter bobble head for my desk. Except that it doesn't look like him at all. But I also discovered they don't have a Drew Brees bobble head. Does anyone else find that strange? I'm deeply disappointed in you NFLshop.

The more things change...

You know the saying the more things change the more they stay the same? Well after writing this post I realized just how true it is.

Someone who reads my blog occasionally, but sometimes forgets that there is a comments section told me that she read that post and she laughed. I couldn't figure out why she thought it was so funny until I really started to think about it.

It would appear that I'm exactly where I started a little over a year and a half ago. I'm about the graduate from my certificate program, whereas in May of 2007, I was graduating from University. I have the same job that I did when I first graduated, but in between I worked a term in a different department. I live with my little brother in an apartment, but he moved out for about 6 months in between. Even on the crushing side I'm still crushing on a QB who's mom probably cuts his hair, though I've switched from Eli Manning to Jay Cutler.

So really as much as things have changed in the past year I'm really back to where I started.

Screw You, Kyle Orton

Also (too), what the crap Braylon Edwards? Way to have a good game when you're sitting on my bench. Once again my fantasy team got killed. This was a freaking terrible week. I should have started Jay Cutler, not that he was much better and he doesn't look nearly so much fun to drink with.

Although the injury to not-so-drunken Kyle Orton did lead to the return of Rex Grossman. It also lead to the return of the Rexy-Back video. Seriously every time I hear Sexy-Back I start singing these words instead. There is also a Matt Hasselback version of the song but it's not as cool.

And so it begins

As you know I'm not a huge fan of my job. It has it's good days and it's bad days. I would be really sad to leave some of the people I've met at work. Even sadder if I wasn't there to collect when I win fantasy football (you know if Drew Brees and Jay Cutler don't crap out on me like they did last week). At the same time I think perhaps it's time to cut the cord.

I've watched five of my former classmates crawl up the ranks at my workplace each making more money than I do all because I was willing to settle and scared to try something else. Well I've just fixed up my resume for an internal posting and well if that doesn't work out, hell I've got an updated resume so I might as well test the waters.

Maybe I'll get scared and not be able to actually take that leap. Actually that's the most likely scenario. But I'd like to believe that if it came to it I would be able to do it but I have issues with change.

Because I haven't mentioned him in almost a month

Here's some Jay Cutler pouty face. This is the new official face of my work day.

God he's cute. You know now that I look at it again I think perhaps he's stoned. Any thoughts on the use of marijuana to treat diabetes?

Yup, it's love

Anyone remember the days when I was in love with Eli Manning? When he would be absolutely terrible and I'd shrug it off and say "it's just one game". You know back before he was Superbowl MVP. Well you know how I was developing a big crush on Jay Cutler? . Yeah well my reaction to his play on Sunday where he threw more interceptions than touchdowns and did pretty much nothing for my fantasy team was "it's okay, I still love you". Dammit, what's wrong with me.

I've also noticed that he looks a little stoned, pretty much all the time. Much like my fantasy team I can only see this ending badly. Hopefully this was the result of a bye week for most of my favorite teams and will pass quickly.

In other news I'm back to a previous office crush. I'm hoping that this is just a residual feeling from the growing love of Jay Cutler. But I had a strange dream about him the other night. I very rarely remember my dreams so this is kind of strange.

I'm kind of worried about myself

I think you're all fully aware that I am playing fantasy football against a bunch of guys that I work with. If you're not aware of this fact then I probably haven't talked to you in the past month. Also as you know I've abandoned Drew Brees (who I love) for Jay Cutler as my starting QB.

Ever since I posted that McDonald's commercial I've found myself with a growing crush on Jay Cutler. It doesn't hurt that he's putting up ridiculous numbers and winning me fantasy match-ups. Also we have a mutual dislike of Phillip Rivers. I don't know the whole Rivers/Cutler history but Phillip Rivers is a douchebag. Actually my dislike of Phillip Rivers probably stems from this exact incident involving Jay Cutler:



Other Jay Cutler randomness that only makes him cuter in my very messed up mind. He's 6'3, I have this thing about height since my younger brother is 6'3. He's from Santa Clause, Indiana. He's got Type I diabetes. He played his college football at Vanderbilt which is not exactly known as a football school.

But he's not exactly cute. Case in point this is the best picture I could find of him:

But only liking a person because they are cute is shallow right? So you should all be encouraging this then.