Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The end to the relationship that wasn't

I'm sure some of you have been wondering about my love life since I wrote this post about a month ago. Well here's the story.

I met this guy online (hey we're in the digital age I won't feel bad for meeting people online!) about 4 months ago and we've been talking everyday ever since. Usually for several hours a day. But sadly he's 19.5 hours away by car. About 3.5 by plane. From the beginning I think we knew that distance was going to be an issue, but in a world of Skype and webcams and long distance relationships it was possible that maybe it could work out. Well it didn't. As much as we always wished we could be together physically to kiss or hug or cuddle it just wasn't practical.

Even when we talked about visiting each other there was always a problem. And neither of us is exactly rolling in cash. So I guess it just wasn't meant to be. So we had the where do we stand talk and settled on friends. The problem is it's hard to talk to him now because all of those romantic notions I had about him are still in my head.

But it's even harder now as I'm finding out there are things he didn't tell me because he didn't want to hurt me. Like that he's been dating. We had talked about how we were going to deal with the issue of dating other people because we weren't together and we live so far apart. And I said I wanted to know. He was always reluctant and didn't want to tell me unless things got serious but I needed to know so that I could properly prepare myself for what was to come. So he agreed. Or at least he agreed in theory, apparently in practice he felt the need to protect me.

So yeah we're done. It's been a couple days now and it's still a little rough. But I'm not quite ready to cut him out of my life completely. I know he cares about me, and I care about him. So it's hard to just say so long. But right now I'm so pissed at him that I don't even want to talk to him. Am I out of line? Am I over reacting to his lie by ommission? Have you tried the long distance thing?

Edit: After reviewing the transcripts (of course I save these things) it turns out it was an actual explicit lie and not a lie by ommission. Which makes it a little worse.


KEG said...

Don't talk to him. I know it hurts now, but could you ever truly be friend, or would you just always hope for something more. I've done the friend route lots. It never works out. Just my two cents. P.S. I got into grad school!

JTS said...

Oh KEG always with the words of wisdom. This is why we're friends. Woohoo on the grad school by the way.