Things just seem to keep getting more complicated. A week after this happened I'm still struggling with what to do.
A brilliant woman told me to quit talking to him and I think that's where I'm at. I took some time and tried to discuss with him how we were going to carry on as friends without all of that other stuff getting in the way. There was no satisfactory solution but to hope that over time it wouldn't hurt so much. Well almost a week later it still really hurt. And frankly the last thing I need in my life right now is more hurt. So I reached the conclusion that while it would be hard I would suck it up, take KEG's advice and stop talking to him.
So I tried to tell him that. It didn't go well. First of all it hurt like hell. I mean to go from spending hours a day together to none at all was just a terrible thought. But I rationalized it by saying to myself that the only way for both of us to truly move on was to make a clean break. For some reason he got angry with me. He told me to take some time to figure out what I wanted, and then when I told him he got mad. So mad in fact that he said some really, really terrible hurtful things to me.
He later apologized for these things and told me he spoke out of anger and pretty much begged me not to cut him out of my life completely. I told him I'd think about it and he agreed to give me as much time and space as I needed. The problem is now I'm just not sure that he really is the guy I thought he was. I can understand that he was upset but what he said was totally uncalled for. At this point if he's waiting to hear from me it's looking like it might be a long time, and might be a simple FU. Yes I realize that's not real grown up but I'm not so sure that he even deserves a grown up reaction from me.